Love Life Coaching

He Says He Doesn’t Want to Lose You: Does He Mean It?

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What does it mean exactly when he says he doesn’t want to lose you? A friend of mine had a boyfriend who recently broke up with her. He is now seeing another woman (at least one she knows of) but he keeps calling her to chat as if they are friends. She has told him this is hard for her to do, that she cannot be friends, but he keeps telling her he doesn’t want to lose her.

He Says He Doesn't Want to Lose You

He Says He Doesn’t Want to Lose You

Well, I want to go to Chanel and grab a bunch of stuff, not pay for it and not go directly to jail. Not going to happen. If this guy really doesn’t want to lose her, why did he dump her? Why is he doing everything he can to lose her?

When men do not want to make a commitment or decide they want to see other people they let you go and end the relationship. Very often they will turn around and insist on maintaining a friendship with you because they don’t want to lose you. This is their way of keeping you on the hook, making it difficult for you to move on and get closure.



They may want sex with no commitment, they may want you as someone to fall back on if their new prospects don’t work out, or someone to be with, talk to, or have sex with when no one else is available. If they told you THAT you would tell them to go straight to hell. So they don’t. They give you the bulls*it line of “being fiends” and/or “not wanting to lose you”. What he is really saying is he does not want to lose you as back up, or as someone to have sex with or hang out with when he feels like it.

Now why don’t you want to lose him? You may think he is a great guy but in reality he’s selfish and cares little about your feelings. He knows this is hurting you and he doesn’t care. You may think everything else in your relationship is perfect except for this one thing, but that is like saying a house is perfect without a roof.

It doesn’t matter how well you get along in the past. He has manipulated you back then into thinking you could have him all to yourself and that he wanted the same things you did. He made you believe he is really a great guy. Unfortunately you were fooled back then and are now seeing who he really is. This guy uses a woman’s emotions against her. He wants her to fall for him so he can get what he wants from her whenever he wants. He can bail whenever he wants, and keep stringing you along as long as he wants.  When he says he doesn’t want to lose you but is doing bubbkus to keep you, he is full of sh*t and you need to lose him and find someone worthy of you.


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Sarah Adelle

Sarah is a Certified Relationship Life Coach and Soulmate ~ Twin Flame expert with 20+ years experience helping clients around the world live the life and have the relationship they desire. Sarah is here to empower you to see the truth in your situation, not enable you to remain in a place that keeps you stuck and unhappy. Sarah will lift you to see the reality of your situation, providing guidance to see you through it. She will also help you get control of your relationship, if it can be saved, so you have can the relationship you have hoped for. Sarah co-hosts two weekly radio shows, primarily geared toward relationship issues, called Empower Enlighten Envision on Weds nights on BlogTalkRadio as well as CBS NewSkyRadio.


  1. Olivia

    March 23, 2015 at 11:14 pm

    This same thing happened with 2 different guys I had relationships with!

  2. Glenda

    April 14, 2015 at 12:57 pm

    If someone doesn’t want to lose you, they won’t just say it, they will show it

  3. Eva

    May 19, 2015 at 11:15 am

    I hate when they say one thing and their actions another!

  4. Linda

    July 12, 2015 at 10:18 am

    Hmm, this makes sense. Every guy I have heard that from DID lose me!

  5. June

    April 3, 2017 at 9:08 am

    My ex went back to his ex wife after 3 yrs of being with me it’s been rocky with us he left her and his grown up children shortly after losing his eldest son who passed away all I got was a text saying he had to choose between me and them and his loyalty is with his ex and there eldest daughters and he couldn’t have me to so sad but he’s made his choice he had affairs all through his marriage to his ex wife is it going to work he’s not young any comments appreciated thank you

  6. June

    April 3, 2017 at 9:11 am

    I feel so lost without him

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