Love Life Coaching

If You Get Played by a Player

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Many men really love being called a player, and many times will act as though being called one is a compliment. And to many men, it is. Women, on the other hand, know that if a man is a player he is not good relationship material, but someone to be avoided. A player knows what to say and when to say it, even if he does not mean it. That is the whole concept behind being a player. They “play”, with women’s feelings, use those feelings against those women, and manipulate them to get what they want. It is “playing” a “role”of the man they think you want, to get what they want from you. A man is called a player, but if he were a woman, he would probably be called a manipulative bitch or something equally as charming.

If You Get Played by a Player

If You Get Played by a Player

Players size women up easily, and are able to spot vulnerabilities and weaknesses in women, using them to their advantage. Players make you feel wonderful and special at the beginning, in an effort to make you fall for their lies (by action or words) so they get what they want and “win” the game. When the game is over, players no longer see the need to play the role any longer, and will begin to show their true colors. Things can change overnight, or more gradually, but they will change, and it will be over. All games end, and when it does, players are out to play with a new opponent and take on their next challenge.

Women have to protect themselves from these predatory men. If a man seems too smooth, comes on too strong, or seems to good to be true, he is probably a player. These men have a shtick, and are so comfortable in their roles, it is almost second nature to them. Use your gut instincts, and if you feel you may have met a player, walk away from the game, because you can’t win. Players are professionals at getting under women’s skin. Don’t bother making it a game between the two of you to see who can win, because it won’t be you. The fact that you even waste your time on him means you already lost.

When it is over, and he begins to change or abruptly leaves, rather than obsess about how good he was in the beginning, accept that you got played. He was not the guy who you saw at the beginning, that was so nice to you, said all those wonderful things to you, and made you feel special. That was an act, he was playing a part, and he is a piece of human waste. He was always emotionally unavailable to you, and whatever you think he felt, he felt nothing. Don’t feel ashamed or stupid, because in truth, you are worth more than a thousand players. Drop him from your mind the way he dropped you from his life because he is not worth another nanosecond of you time.

 

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Sarah Adelle

Sarah is a Certified Relationship Life Coach and Soulmate ~ Twin Flame expert with 20+ years experience helping clients around the world live the life and have the relationship they desire. Sarah is here to empower you to see the truth in your situation, not enable you to remain in a place that keeps you stuck and unhappy. Sarah will lift you to see the reality of your situation, providing guidance to see you through it. She will also help you get control of your relationship, if it can be saved, so you have can the relationship you have hoped for. Sarah co-hosts two weekly radio shows, primarily geared toward relationship issues, called Empower Enlighten Envision on Weds nights on BlogTalkRadio as well as CBS NewSkyRadio.

4 Comments

  1. Elle

    July 9, 2015 at 1:43 am

    I’m writing to ask if you could offer your suggestions on this situation, – I’m aware there’s still a high chance he hasn’t forgotten his ex, am I just a texting buddy to him? How can I sound him out and know how he feels about me?

    I’m writing to ask if you could offer your suggestions on this situation, – I’m aware there’s still a high chance he hasn’t forgotten his ex, am I just a texting buddy to him? How can I sound him out and know how he feels about me?

    Scenario:

    I’ve known him for a year plus via a mutual interest group online. We share a number of similarities and would frequently text each other (even told today). Our conversations are usually on broad topics, light hearted and casual. There’s this texting chemistry when we communicate via texts and I’ve revealed my feelings to him last year. He was calm and polite about it – no outright rejection or acceptance. But according to him, he definitely enjoys communicating.

    Just a month back, he experienced a breakup. He felt despondent, and I didn’t probe further. We still text each other even after his break up.

    A few days ago, he sent a good morning text @ 6am. We texted throughout the entire day and engaged in light teasing. He seemed as though he had gotten over the break up. His replies were quite prompt and enthusiastic (despite work). Even hinted me to join him on a short vacation. However, in the night, he claimed he felt moody & had insomnia due to body ache (participated in a marathon). Our exchange ended shortly thereafter.

    Just yesterday, he initiated another text “hello” and I replied with “hey morning :)” he didn’t respond, not until I sent him another text on news regarding something we had common interest in.

    I’m writing to ask if you could offer your suggestions on this situation, – I’m aware there’s still a high chance he hasn’t forgotten his ex, am I just a texting buddy to him? How can I sound him out and know how he feels about me?

    • Sarah Adelle

      Sarah Adelle

      July 9, 2015 at 10:58 am

      He is showing you all he wants right now is to text you. He has made that clear enough, hasn’t he? If we wants more, and is ready for more, he will act on it. If you push him for more or try and get him to express feelings that he obviously isn’t ready to, the whole thing could blow up in your face.

  2. Anna Y Moss

    December 17, 2016 at 11:50 pm

    The last sentences of the article are a lot easier said than done.

    • Sarah Adelle

      Sarah Adelle

      December 17, 2016 at 11:52 pm

      I disagree. Hanging on to thoughts of a player is hard on yourself, where letting them go is empowering.

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