Love Life Coaching

Top 10 Tips to Heal a Broken Heart

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It has been said that no pain is worse than a broken heart. If you have lost someone you love and are suffering from a broken heart, all you want is for that pain to end. Each day seems like an enormous struggle. You can’t picture your life without the one you love and don’t know how you are going to cope with the loss. You can’t stop thinking about it, and worry you may never be able to be happy again. How can you heal your broken heart and pick up the pieces to move forward with your life? Do broken hearts stay broken? Is there any way to make the pain and heartache be more bearable? We sympathize with all of you that have had your hearts broken. We wish we could help each and every one of you. Healing a broken heart is painful, difficult and takes time. Here are our top 10 tips to heal a broken heart so you can begin healing as soon as possible.

Tips to Heal a Broken Heart

1. Don’t relive your relationship. Don’t take the heart-breaking trips down memory lane that remind you of the good times you had. Don’t go over the break up in your mind over and over again. Don’t analyze each and every detail and torture yourself. You may think it would help heal a broken heart to think of happier days, but it has the opposite effect. Instead of healing, it keeps the wounds open. Put away the love letters, cards, and all the reminders you can. One day you may be able to look at them and feel something positive, but for now they are like daggers in your heart.
Top 10 Tips to Heal a Broken Heart

Top 10 Tips to Heal a Broken Heart

2. Accept, for now, that the relationship is over. Until you accept your loss, you cannot begin to heal your broken heart. Stop looking for ways to get him or her back. For right now, it is over. Deal with your present reality. If you stay stuck on false hope of reconciliation, your broken heart wont have a chance to heal because you are not giving it a chance to heal.
3. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family. When your heart is broken, the last thing you need is to spend too much time alone. Have a support network that will talk about your break up or loss if you initiate the subject, and will steer clear of it if you don’t. Have them bring you outside of your home and help you get out of your head. When you surround yourself with people who love and care about you, you feel less lonely, and are reminded that you still have people in your life that love you. This helps to heal a broken heart.
4. Don’t try to use a new relationship to get over the one that broke your heart. Until your broken heart heals, don’t get involved with someone else. Don’t contact exes from your past or rush into a new relationship right away. Many people think the fastest way to heal a broken heart is to find love again. That is simply not true. When you have an open heart, not a broken heart, you can begin your search for love again. Tell all your friends and family that tell you to get out there and put yourself out there to shut up because you aren’t ready.
5. Focus on yourself as an individual, not as part of a couple. When you lost your relationship, you also lost your role as part of a couple. You may have really liked being part of a team, but now it is time to focus on you again. Now that you are in control of all your free time, don’t dwell on the things you used to do as a couple. Either do them as a single person and allow yourself to enjoy them, or find new things to do that bring you joy. Often in relationships will feel selfish if all we concern ourselves with is our own needs and desires. Now you can pursue your goals and desires guilt free.
6. Stop beating yourself up. Stop thinking of everything you did wrong. Stop blaming yourself for why your heart is broken. Sure, learning from your mistakes is good, but you might want to learn that further down the line. Beating yourself up right now is not empowering, because your broken heart has weakened you for the time being. When your broken heart has healed, reflect on your relationship and look for what lessons and wisdom there are for you to apply going forward.
7. Do not rewrite history. Do not think of the things you could have said or done. What is done is done. You can’t change the past so don’t spend your time trying to rewrite it. Don’t make the one who has broken your heart out to be any better or worse than they really are. Don’t romanticize them and focus on only their good side. It is not worth it to dwell on just the negative about them either. This helps fuel your anger towards them, which may get in the way of your progress towards healing your broken heart.
8. Make yourself feel useful again. You may not feel like you have anything to offer anyone right now, or that you don’t have the strength to help yourself. Why not try coming to the aid of someone or a cause that could use your help? You could gain a lot of strength, empowerment, and satisfaction by helping those less fortunate than yourself. It can help you feel good about yourself and make you feel useful again. It also can help you feel more productive and make you less self-destructive.
9. Get rid of triggers that hurt you rather than help you. You cannot heal a broken heart if you keep picking at the wound. Don’t stalk them on social media. Delete them on social media. Delete their friends too if seeing them causes you pain. Don’t worry what they will think, focus on yourself for right now. Don’t hack their email, contact their friends or family for information about how they are doing and what they are doing. Finding out information about them or seeking out reminders of them will not help heal your broken heart. The only thing it will do is keep breaking your heart.
10. Change your habits, behaviors and rituals. When a relationship ends, so do all the habits and rituals you shared with that person. For instance, if you had coffee every Sunday at a certain place and then went shopping, Sundays are going to be very hard for you. You will be reminded of what you used to do, and how much you enjoyed it. Now is the time to create a new Sunday ritual. It can be alone or with others, so long as it is something you enjoy.
Healing a broken heart takes time. There is no quick fix, but you can and will get through it. Just take it day by day, and do the best you can.

 

Sarah Adelle

Sarah is a Certified Relationship Life Coach and Soulmate ~ Twin Flame expert with 20+ years experience helping clients around the world live the life and have the relationship they desire. Sarah is here to empower you to see the truth in your situation, not enable you to remain in a place that keeps you stuck and unhappy. Sarah will lift you to see the reality of your situation, providing guidance to see you through it. She will also help you get control of your relationship, if it can be saved, so you have can the relationship you have hoped for. Sarah co-hosts two weekly radio shows, primarily geared toward relationship issues, called Empower Enlighten Envision on Weds nights on BlogTalkRadio as well as CBS NewSkyRadio.

2 Comments

  1. Regina orgeron

    August 11, 2016 at 3:56 pm

    There’s this guy I’ve been talking two for 2 years total bliss we we’re in a long distance relationship he in Indiana I in Mississippi we professed our love for each other and needless to say I thought that he was the one he seemed to be everything I’ve always hoped for even calling him my angel from heaven at 55 years old it’s very unlikely that I will ever love again he has never actually told me that it was over but he seemed to just have fallen off the face of the earth I’ve been desperately grasping at straws trying to figure out what happened to him he promised that he would never leave me and that we would for certain be together some day I just need some answers

    • Sarah Adelle

      Sarah Adelle

      August 11, 2016 at 4:07 pm

      No one can “promise” you they will never leave you. I mean come on. What does a promise like that mean anyway? People take marriage vows and yet people get divorced. What answer are you looking for? If he is acting as if he ended things with you, what do you need? You need to know why? What difference would that make? When you get involved with someone in a long distance relationship you have a lot going against you. These relationships are very difficult to make work. I am sorry it didn’t work out for you, but face the reality that he isnt this angel from heaven, because an angel wouldn’t break promises or drop off the face of the earth would they?

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