Love Life Coaching

Trying Again and Again With an Ex

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I have noticed a strange phenomenon when it comes to pens. Most people I know have a pen holder or a collection of pens somewhere in their house. I have seen them try to write with a pen, see that it clearly does not work, AND THEN PUT THE PEN BACK IN THE PEN HOLDER. I ask them “Do you think it is going so magically work later? Why not just throw it out?”.

Trying Again and Again With an Ex

Trying Again and Again With an Ex

Many of them didn’t even realize they were doing it, and then tossed out the broken pen. Others said they actually DID think the pen might work later. I bet many of you reading this have a pen in your house that does not work that you, for some reason, didn’t it throw away.

This reminds me so much of how so many women hold on to people the same way. How many times do you have to see that a relationship with them clearly will not work? When is it time to throw your ex or current partner,and your hopes for then to change, in the trash? Why do we keep trying to make something that is clearly broken work? There are so many people in the world, do we really have to give the same ones a try knowing full well it will almost definitely end in disaster?

Instead of trying again and again with the same person, accept the fact that he wasn’t right for you and stop hoping someday he will be. Would you keep trying on a dress in a store if it did not fit you the first time around? Maybe if you changed and lost weight that would make sense, but remember, the DRESS DOES NOT CHANGE. Same with people. If the problems the relationship had were mostly his, the chances of him changing WHO HE IS are slim. More than likely the only thing that DID change was you, and for the worse. When you keep trying and trying with a partner or ex partner, your self-esteem plummets, your sense of self-worth and self-respect suffers. Then you become someone your ex barely recognizes.

You should put a limit on how many times you are willing to try with the same person. Women need to realize that giving up on a lost cause is powerful, not weak. You set the limit for how often someone is allowed to hurt you, not him. He cannot cheat on you any more than you let him. He cannot disrespect you any more than you let him. He can’t treat you like shit anymore than you let him. How can you let him do that to you anymore and still be with him? You can’t, that is why you have to toss him in the trash, like everything else that no longer works for you.

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Sarah Adelle

Sarah is a Certified Relationship Life Coach and Soulmate ~ Twin Flame expert with 20+ years experience helping clients around the world live the life and have the relationship they desire. Sarah is here to empower you to see the truth in your situation, not enable you to remain in a place that keeps you stuck and unhappy. Sarah will lift you to see the reality of your situation, providing guidance to see you through it. She will also help you get control of your relationship, if it can be saved, so you have can the relationship you have hoped for. Sarah co-hosts two weekly radio shows, primarily geared toward relationship issues, called Empower Enlighten Envision on Weds nights on BlogTalkRadio as well as CBS NewSkyRadio.

1 Comment

  1. Nora

    April 25, 2015 at 1:20 pm

    Yes, there should be a limit to how many chances we give them. Sad thing is we always seem to give them more chances then they deserve.

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