Love Life Coaching

Where is Your Relationship Going?

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If your relationship was like a car and you were the driver, you would be able to steer it in the direction of your choice. The problem is that most women take a “passenger seat” in relationships finding themselves at the mercy of the “driver” and ┬ánot knowing if they are on a dead end or the highway of love.

If you are currently single and looking for your next relationship, be sure to do some of the driving. You would try to navigate your journey so you don’t get lost along the way wouldn’t you? You would buy maps, check mapquest, and get directions to get where you need to go as quickly as possible without wasting time getting lost along the way.

The same should be true for relationships. First you need to know where you want to go, meaning what kind of relationship you want, then you must chart your course on how to get there. You really have to assume responsibility for having the relationship you want. In charting your course though, you have to take a long hard look at the person undertaking this journey with you. Will they have to stop and take pee breaks every five seconds so it take you 10 times longer to get there? Will they refuse to follow the directions (like many men) and take you completely off course? You need to find out where THEY want to go, and how ready they are to GET THERE.

Sure, any man can tell you he wants a long term relationship so he can settle down. If that is true, then he should act like someone who is looking to settle down. He would be looking for someone who shares his interests and goals. He should be looking for the one that he feels is the right kind of woman for him, not serial dating women based on how “hot” they are. He also would want to know where YOU stand as well. Someone who is really looking to settle down should have no problem discussing it with you.

where is your relationship going

Where is Your Relationship Going?

If he avoids discussing relationships, feelings, and the future, then he is full of shit and is just looking for a joyride. If that is what you want, fine, but if it isn’t, don’t get in the car. Do you really want your relationships future to be “destination unknown”? Don’t you pay attention to signs when you are driving? Would you drive down a dead-end road and expect to get anywhere? Same thing with a dead-end relationship. The signs are THERE and just like road signs, they are pretty easy to spot. If you knew you were lost and off your course, would you keep going in the wrong direction? Is this the right course for you in getting the relationship you desire?

Unless you plan on going completely AROUND THE WORLD how can you expect to arrive at your destination? You WONT. Women always complain that when MEN get lost they refuse to ask for directions, when so many women allow themselves to get lost within a relationship and refuse to ask directions, they just keep traveling down the wrong road.

You should also know your speed, and what the limits are for going too fast and going to slow. If your relationship is going 5 miles per hour, you either need to speed it up or expect to arrive at the place you want to be when you are 452 years old. Got that much time? Didn’t think so.

 Driving too fast is never a good idea either, and if your relationship is going at 110 miles an hour, you need to slow down or you are sure to crash and burn. Yes speed can be a thrill, but it cannot be sustained and a crash at that speed causes major damage. When someone is driving too fast we think of how reckless they are (and stupid) but it is the same when it comes to relationships.

It’s not the distance, it’s the RIDE. Where you want to be at the end of your journey, let’s say it is marriage, needs the experience of the journey itself to sustain it. You can rush it, but cheated yourself of the time you needed to sustain it long term.

Accidents can and do happen. When an accident happens there are a few things that must be dealt with: the damage done, and where the fault lies. Relationships can get wrecked too, and you should really take a good look at the person you are involved with because they can wreck your life. Would you let someone who has 3 DWIs, 15 speeding tickets, and 4 accidents in the last 6 years drive YOUR car? You wouldn’t – because his driving skills SUCK. Well why would you get involved with a man who has zero relationship skills?

You are more protective over your CAR than your heart? Whoever caused the accident is responsible for fixing the damages. When it is his fault, does his fix things or leave you a broken jalopy?During your road trips you have to stop for gas. The car simply won’t take you anywhere without it. It needs gas to run. What do YOU need to keep you going? Is your relationship providing you with it? If it isn’t, you are never going to get anywhere. You stay stuck on the side of the road. We can learn at a very young age how to drive, and must pass a test in order to get a drivers license.

where is your relationship going

Where is Your Relationship Going?

Unfortunately there is no schooling to learn relationship skills, no test we must pass before we get behind the wheel and become menaces to those out on the road with us. Cars have insurance, so if someone gets hurt or something is damaged it can be fixed. We can hold the person that hurts us or damages our relationships responsible but we can do almost nothing to get them to fix it for us. We are more vulnerable in relationships than when we drive, and just as there are reckless drivers out on the road, there are more reckless people out in search of (or involved in) relationships that are an accident waiting to happen.

So take your time planning your journey, chart your course, stop for gas along the way, enjoy the scenery – and enjoy the ride — if you are not, leave the broken jalopy on the side of the road and go and find a car with a steady engine that makes you happy. Sometimes it can take several trips until you find Mr. Right and you will leave many Mr. Wrongs on the side of the road along the way. Good for you! You are taking the right actions to make sure your relationship goals and desires are fulfilled and by the right guy!

 

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Sarah Adelle

Sarah is a Certified Relationship Life Coach and Soulmate ~ Twin Flame expert with 20+ years experience helping clients around the world live the life and have the relationship they desire. Sarah is here to empower you to see the truth in your situation, not enable you to remain in a place that keeps you stuck and unhappy. Sarah will lift you to see the reality of your situation, providing guidance to see you through it. She will also help you get control of your relationship, if it can be saved, so you have can the relationship you have hoped for. Sarah co-hosts two weekly radio shows, primarily geared toward relationship issues, called Empower Enlighten Envision on Weds nights on BlogTalkRadio as well as CBS NewSkyRadio.

1 Comment

  1. Alice

    July 19, 2015 at 11:16 am

    love your blog it has helped me a lot

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