Almost everyone would prefer to avoid bad relationships rather than get into them. The issue is that more and more people these days find themselves entering into relationships with the wrong people. You have to take a certain amount of risk when you put your heart on the line and your trust into someone else’s hands. That cannot be avoided, but you can minimize the risks you take with your heart, time, and trust.
Here are five ways to help you make better choices so you can find the right people to be in a relationship with and avoid the wrong people.
- The first way would be to pay attention to red flags. Consider them a sign of worse things to come. Do not make excuses for the red flags, and do not minimize to trivialize them either. The universe is showing you these red flags for a reason, and the reason is a good one. Don’t think for one minute those red flags are not important, and won’t come back to haunt you later on. They are signs of things to come, and it will be worse, not better than you imagine.
- Our second way to avoid bad relationships with the wrong people is to never lower your standards. Don’t let loneliness, desperation, or eagerness to move on as an excuse to settle for less than you deserve. Lowering your standards in a relationship will only bring you what you don’t want. Yes, you may have a relationship, but it won’t be one that makes you happy so why bother? As you get to know yourself better, you know more about what kind of person you will be compatible with. You should know what behaviors, etc. are off-limits, and you should not compromise when it comes to your standards. If anything, raise your standards, but don’t lower them.
- The third way to avoid a bad relationship with someone who is not right for you is to focus your attention more on their actions than their words. Anyone can say anything, and lies with words are easy. Lies with our actions are much harder. Don’t let their words fool you, because in reality, their actions will reveal more of the truth than their words will. For instance, if someone apologizes profusely over and over and says all the right things, yet continues to make the same mistakes, which should you believe? Obviously their actions, because their words don’t mean a damn thing. Don’t fall for the lies anymore, and be more willing to believe the truth in their actions instead.
- The fourth way would be to live in the here and now. Don’t buy the future promises of taking you on vacation, of them leaving their wife or girlfriend, or when they will stop working so much, etc. What are they doing, as opposed to saying, right now? Are you happy right now? If you are not happy right now, and the relationship isn’t right for you, why believe “someday” it will get better? If they are not willing to put forth an effort right now, why are you wasting your time on them?
- And the last way to help avoid a bad relationship is to place a higher value on yourself. if you were in a bad relationship previously, take some time off from dating to help build your self-confidence back up. Work on yourself, detox from that past relationship and so you can attract better people and will not attract the same type of people who are wrong for you.
There are other ways of course to avoid bad relationships, but using these for starters can help you to stop wasting your precious time with the wrong people and allow you the space to find the right one for you.