Why did he get back together with his ex? Didn’t he say how miserable they were in that relationship? Didn’t he say how happy he was with you and how unhappy he was with her? Didn’t he swear the last thing on earth he would do would be to get back together with his ex? Well, after all of the bitching and complaining, he decided to get back together with his ex, and you cannot help but wonder why they did.
The first thing you must understand is that he lied. Second, they only told you part of the story, not the whole story. He made his ex sound like a crazy person who did not appreciate him. He left out the part of explaining his part in the relationship. He probably let out the part where he drove his ex crazy as well as HIS dysfunctional behavior in their relationship. Sure, you heard all the complaints about her, but did bother to tell you his ex’s complaints about him? Surely not.
He just happened to leave all that crap out. The person the ex saw is not the person you came to know. His ex knows a lot more about him than you do. His ex knows the other side of the story, you don’t. She saw them in action, you only saw him on his best behavior. She knows what he is capable of, and has seen his bad side more than once. You were not privy to that information. So, the person you met and fell in love with was only a small part of who they really are.
He heavily edited who he truly is a person so they came across as a sympathy needing victim. The thing is, a true sympathetic victim would not have thrown away a chance at a decent relationship with you if that is what they truly were after. But someone knowing it would be temporary, most certainly would. We hate to put it bluntly, but everyone on earth is aware he is not over his ex. They know what they would do if he had the chance to get back together with his ex.
We know our hearts, and know if we still are interested in rekindling a past relationship. He knows it too. So while he was trying to win you over and convince you what a great, perfect person he was, he knew all along if given the chance he would get back together with his ex. He did not become suddenly confused, or surprised, that they still had feelings for his ex. He had to do something when their relationship ended. He had a choice to remain single and celibate and wait for the chance to get back together with his ex, or to start a temporary relationship with someone else who they could toss aside when their ex came back.
Sorry, but you were just a part of their plan. He chose not to be alone during their temporary break up.
It may have been because he needs sex, an ego boost, or to get word back to their ex they were seeing someone new. Your relationship was not a fairytale romance with the perfect man.You were nothing but a footnote in the story of their relationship with their ex. You were not the whole story, you were a part of their story. He may try to keep you on the back burner in case the relationship with his ex has another break up. If you choose to wait around for the opportunity to get screwed over again, that is on you. In most cases you will be used again for the same reasons he used you before.
Let him get back together with his ex and accept his choice. Accept the reality that they didn’t really want something sane and normal like they told you they wanted. Accept the lies and accept that they used you. Accept the whole story instead of writing a fantasy novel of your own, that he was the victim of an evil ex with a stronghold over him. Don’t write a fantasy version of this reality, where he goes back to his ex and it won’t work out, so he comes running back to you begging your forgiveness and you live happily ever after. The chances of that happening are very slim.
Instead start a new chapter in your life and close the book on that horror story!