If You’re Not Interested in Him, Here’s What To Do

What should you do when you are not interested someone? Depending on the situation, there are right ways and wrong ways of handling it. If someone is expressing an interest in dating you but you are not interested in them you can try to give them hints before they make their move. You bring up things like “I am not ready to date anyone right now” or “I am happy being single” in conversation. You can also pretend to be in a relationship with someone.

But what if they ask you out anyway? Well, if they didn’t take the hint still try to let them down gently, but firmly. No one really wants to hurt someones feelings and some people have a hard time rejecting someone for fear of doing just that. It is worse to lead them on or give them false hope. If you don’t want to hurt their feelings just tell them it is not about them. You could say you are not ready to date anyone right now, or that you are still hung up or healing from an ex. If they don’t want to take no for an answer, you may have to avoid that person for a while. Hopefully that will give them some time to put their focus elsewhere.

Not Interested in Him, Here's What To Do

Not Interested in Him 

But what if you already started dating and just now realized you are not interested in pursuing a relationship with them? The point of dating is to see how compatible the two of you are and if you are a good match to pursue a relationship down the line. Not every person you date has to or should lead to a relationship. If people used dating for its proper purpose they could avoid a lot of toxic, shitty relationships. So don’t feel bad about telling someone you don’t think you should see each other anymore. Why waste both of your time on something that isn’t right for either of you?

It is understandable that most people would not want to have that conversation in person unless you are a sadist. Just don’t do it by text. That adds insult to injury. At least talk to the person on the phone, and if they want an explanation, give them one. You don’t have to talk to them for 12 hours, but give them some time to speak as well. Most people want to know why someone is not interested in them and if they ask you, try to be kind. Be honest, but be kind. If you feel you are not compatible, say that.

You don’t have to give them a list of 1,000 reasons. If you think there is something you could share with them that may be helpful to them, you can do that as well. One of the worst and most cowardly things you can do though is to ghost someone. When you ghost someone you just disappear without another word and the person has no idea why. If someone was abusive towards you then yes, ghost them. But if they were a decent person but just not what you were looking for, be a decent person yourself and end things like an adult.

Ghosting is more hurtful to most people than if you told them to their face, over the phone, by email or text. So if you think ghosting is the right way to let someone know you aren’t interested in them anymore, you are dead wrong. Do the right thing, and take the time to end things with some dignity.

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  5 comments for “If You’re Not Interested in Him, Here’s What To Do

  1. It’s difficult to say goodbye. You might be the heartbreaker or the one whose heart breaks. But it’s better to clear it out and be honest other than cheating on one another. So all you need to say is “sorry, I am not interested’ and your job is done. Thanks for sharing this article.

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