An emotional affair or relationship is often never questioned or taken as seriously as a physical affair. Because a sexual act has not occurred, many people do not see it as cheating in a relationship. An emotional affair should never be taken lightly. The damage to a relationship due to emotional cheating can be devastating. Many people don’t even understand the concept of an emotional affair.
An emotional affair can occur if you have contact with an ex or member of the opposite sex that you keep private from your husband, wife, girlfriend or boyfriend. If it was just a platonic friendship, and nothing else, why is there a reason to keep it so secret? Are you sharing intimate details of your relationship with a member of the opposite sex and if your loved one found out they would feel horrified or betrayed? To discuss such things with one of your friends is one thing, but a member of the opposite sex is another thing. To make matters worse, the communication that is supposed to be shared within the relationship is being shared outside of the relationship.
When someone is having an emotional affair, they no longer want to share their thoughts, feelings, problems, and issues with their romantic partner. Emotional intimacy is removed from the relationship. Instead, they share it with someone else, who is not involved in the relationship. This breaks down communication between a couple and they grow further and further apart. If the relationship is having problems, rather than working it out as a couple, they seek out their “friend”. The friend is only hearing one side of the story, and it is not their job to fix the relationship anyway. Because the person is putting so much time, energy and effort into the “friendship” they put less and less into their relationship. Because this “friendship” has become so valuable and a source of support they often look forward to the time they can spend or talk with their “friend”. Then they start comparing their “friendship” to their relationship, and often see that their friend understands, agrees, and communicates with them better. In some cases of emotional cheating there is a physical attraction between the “friends”. People who have emotional affairs find themselves pulling away from their husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend because their needs are getting met by their “friend”. Even though they are not having sex with their emotional friend, they withdraw from having sex within their relationship because of the lack of connection and emotional intimacy. Now they feel more connected to their emotional friend.
When someone is having an emotional affair, they may be flirting with their “friend” and find an excitement and stimulation they no longer experience in their relationship. Even though they have not been intimate with their friend they may wonder what it would be like, or fantasize about it. Because they are developing feelings for someone new they are losing site of the feelings for their romantic partner. In many cases, emotional cheating leads to physical cheating, and a lot of these “friends” had that agenda all along.
Let’s face it, cheating is cheating, whether it is emotional or physical. Instead of developing emotions for someone else, focus on the relationship you have and either fix it, or end it. You may be worried your man may have had sex with someone else. Wouldn’t it be just as bad if he was in love or developing feelings with someone else?
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