It may come as a shock to people, but there is such a thing as disposable relationships. Not everyone chooses to enter into a relationship because they think it can develop into something. Quite the contrary. Many people choose to enter into relationships they know are going NOWHERE. These relationships are disposable relationships. People often choose disposable relationships because they do not want a relationship to develop. They just want someone around until they toss them in the trash like they would a paper plate. One of the problems with disposable relationships is that very often only one member of the relationship knows they are disposable.
An example of a disposable relationship would be certain rebound relationships. After being in a serious relationship some people prefer something more casual. They find a relationship that is easy. They are not in it for the long haul. They shut themselves down to a certain degree knowing this relationship will not last. They don’t want to be alone, but they don’t want to get serious either. So, they say what needs to be said, and do what needs to be done to make the other person believe the relationship has potential. In the back of their mind they know it is just a matter of time before they bail. They use this person to transition into a serious relationship with someone else when they are ready to find what they really want.
Sometimes they are still pining away for their ex. Their ex could be with someone new so they want to be as well. They also could want to make their ex jealous. A disposable relationship is perfect for these scenarios. Of course, as stated above, they rarely tell the new person they are involved with they are on borrowed time. It is the difference between paper plates and fine china. Before you buy fine china, you may use paper plates. You don’t think twice about tossing out a paper plate, because after it served it’s purpose it is no longer of any use to you. If you found yourself tossed aside and for no good reason, chances are you were someone’s choice for a disposable relationship.
Booty calls and friends with benefits relationships can be also be disposable relationships. One partner may hope a traditional relationship will come over time, yet the other looks at the relationship as disposable. In many cases, if they wanted a real relationship with you, they would give you a chance. Whatever their excuse is, if they are able to be in a sexual relationship with you, they give more. They CHOOSE not to, because they don’t want to be in a traditional relationship with you. They will dispose of you when they no longer need you or you no longer put up with it.
When it comes to cheating, such as affairs, many choose disposable relationships. Although some affairs lead to emotional investments and relationships, many are just a disposable relationship. Some people are just looking for sex on the side, but they know all along it is going nowhere. They may lead you to believe some day they will leave their spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend, but they know it is not true. When they get caught or you give them an ultimatum, you get tossed out like a paper plate.
Have you ever seen a couple reach a plateau in their relationship and break up? The couple had been together for a while, and one wanted the relationship to go to the next level. The other simply refused, no matter how long they stayed together or how hard they tried. Then they wind up marrying their next partner easily and often quickly. Why does this happen? Because they knew at a certain point the relationship was disposable and that was why they wouldn’t take it to the next level. When they found a relationship that was not disposable for them, the transition was easy.
If someone disappeared from your life, out of the blue, and with no good reason or no real problem, chances are you were in a disposable relationship. The relationship had run its course and it was time for them to trash it. It is hard to not be a victim of a disposable relationship because they are more common that one would think. The best way to get over them is to recognize that they too are disposable. What you lost was not anything with staying power. It is not your fault, but theirs, so don’t beat yourself up. You never really stood a chance in this relationship anyway.
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