Does he have potential? When you begin a relationship, one of the most important things to consider is whether or not he has potential. You need to rationally believe this person can have the kind of relationship with you that will make you happy. If you know yourself well enough, judging if he has relationship potential should be easy enough. Yet time and time again I speak with clients who should have known right from the get go the potential for a healthy relationship really wasn’t there.
If a guy treats you like a secret, like garbage, a booty call, or as an afterthought is obviously not a guy that has potential. Sure, there is a slim chance things may change, but that chance may be as low as the chance you win the lottery. So why take the risk? Because in truth, based on reality, not your hopes or feelings, he doesn’t have good relationship potential. The potential is there for him to break your heart, not magically change his entire personality and become the man of your dreams.
One of the main criteria if you are wondering if he has potential is if he is SINGLE. It’s simple, if he isn’t, he doesn’t. He may potentially have an affair with you, but more than that? Again, slim chance. The chance may be there that he will leave his wife or girlfriend. There is also a chance he won’t, that he just wants sex outside his primary relationship, and that you will be caught. So why bother? He could have more potential if you wait until he is single, and has some time to find himself and get total closure.
If you rush into a relationship too soon with someone newly single, the potential it will work out isn’t really there. He isn’t totally emotionally available, and he isn’t really ready for a relationship right away. So why jump the gun? Be friends for a while and wait for the potential to be there for a happy ending, rather than him getting back with his ex or feeling he took on too much too soon.
If there is a guy who tells you flat-out he isn’t looking for a relationship, then take the hint. The potential isn’t there for anything other than being used for sex and your time. Don’t romanticize it, don’t romance novel it, just forget it and don’t accept the crumbs they are willing to give you.
When he comes on very strong at the beginning don’t get swept up in the whirlwind. A normal relationship starts normal. Sure, coming on strong can seem like a compliment, but it is natural to move to fast. The only reason to move fast is because you need to get what you want, and get out just as quickly. Be very careful, these instant relationships don’t always have the potential they seem to have.
If you really want to know if a relationship has potential, start by asking the right questions. Listen carefully to everything he says and does while you are dating. If someone is looking for the same things you are, then things should evolve organically. If you are looking for a serious relationship and they say they are too, then they shouldn’t still be dating other people after you have dated for a few months. That is a serial dater, with no potential for a real relationship. Don’t assume and create potential in your own mind, let the reality of who he is and what he does show if it is really there or not.