Emotional intimacy in relationships is very important to the quality and longevity of the relationship themselves. The amount of time a couple has been together is not what keeps them together, nor does it automatically make for a positive relationship. What is integral for a relationship to withstand the trials and tribulations in life is emotional intimacy.
Have you heard of couples breaking up because they have “grown apart”? It happens all the time. If the couple had been working on emotional intimacy in their relationship, they wouldn’t have grown apart. Emotional intimacy keeps us connected, allows conversations to flow, and thoughts and feelings to be shared. When it shuts down, guess what happens? You stop talking as much, keeping your feelings to yourself. You stop sharing your goals and dreams with one another. The couple is not walking a path through life together, they are actually taking separate paths at this point.
Not every couple that is together right now has emotional intimacy in their relationship. It takes two, and it takes effort and willingness. If you do not feel loved, you have fear and insecurities. When you are fearful and insecure you don’t feel safe revealing your true feelings or opening yourself up. You more than likely are afraid to even stand up for yourself.
Emotional intimacy can’t be maintained if you feel like that and act like that. It is not necessarily your fault that you do not feel loved or safe in your relationship. You may not even be responsible for being unable to trust your partner. If that is the case, and you both want to stay together, you need to work together on those issues so that emotional intimacy can be reached.
Things will not improve on their own, this is going to take some work on both your parts. You have to be ready to be brave, and make yourselves vulnerable to one another. Be willing to speak your truth, and be willing to listen to your partners. You have to rebuild any trust that has been broken, and when you do, you should both feel free to express yourself to one another. Once you begin doing that again, you will feel closer to each other, and feel as though you have “reconnected”. Set some time apart at least a few times a month to reconnect with your partner so that you will both keep your relationship on solid ground and a healthy foundation.
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