Monogamy in relationships is not always easy. When a relationship gets comfortable, sometimes the eyes and heart begin to wander. The trust that has been built over time could be in jeopardy if they wander too far. Not all people want to be in committed, monogamous relationships. That is the first part of the problem.
If you want monogamy to be part of your relationship but the one you love does not, you may not be compatible where it really counts. When a couple starts dating, the subject of monogamy should be approached early on to learn each others views. If, right away, someone expresses a desire for monogamy at some point, you know that point will eventually come and it will have to be dealt with.
If you are looking for different things from a relationship, they might not be the right person for you. Sure, over time, they may change their mind, but what if they don’t? Not everyone reaches a point where they want monogamy in a relationship. That is a great misconception.
Another huge misconception is that a serial cheater or player will change into Mr. Monogamous when he meets the right girl. That misconception has a lot of women sticking with a cheater or player because they think eventually he will change for them. What happens more often than not is they will keep fighting over his cheating every time he is caught and she will spend way too much time trying to catch him. This is not a healthy situation.
So if you want a monogamous relationship, what the hell are you doing involved with someone actively playing the field with zero intention of slowing down? Wouldn’t it make more sense to find someone who is ready to settle down now instead of pinning all your hopes and future plans on someone who isn’t even close?
Many people may tell you they are looking for the right person and then they will settle down and enter a monogamous relationship with them. Well, if that is true, and they are with you, then why haven’t they done just that? It is either they lied through their teeth because they knew if they told the truth you would have run faster than a cheetah, or they simply aren’t into you enough to do that. That thought may sting, but the truth often does.
If you are truly important enough to someone, they will do what they have to, to keep you. They will also want to be with only you. If they don’t, or take forever to do it, it could be partially your fault. If they think they can have you and anyone else they want with no fear of losing you, then that may be why they are not making that commitment with only you.
If monogamy in a relationship is important to you, then make that clear to anyone you date, and especially anyone you sleep with. If you can sleep with someone and be comfortable you should be comfortable enough to talk to them about monogamy. If you aren’t, then you really shouldn’t be sleeping with them in the first place.