Relationships are a gamble, and you want to place your bet on the ones that have the best chance of surviving. Too many women focus on the wrong risk. They think if they don’t try, they will lose the guy, and risk the chance of losing love and a great relationship. That is the wrong way to look at it. You have to first look at who you are giving the opportunity to hurt you.
Common Relationship Risks
- If you know the guy you find attractive or feel a connection with is married, the chances are so slim that he will leave his wife for you, he is not worth the risk. Nip it in the bud before you become more involved, because this is a risk not worth taking.
- If the man you want has told you he is not looking for a relationship, don’t tell yourself that because of the intense chemistry you share that you shouldn’t walk away. He TOLD YOU he is not looking for a relationship, so believe him, and don’t think it is just a matter of time before you change his mind.
- If the man you really feel a spark with is looking for just sex, don’t risk getting hurt and disappointed by allowing a friends with benefits relationship thinking someday it will be more. Chances are it won’t, and it is not worth the risk.
- If the man you are with has a terrible reputation for being a player, user or cheater, don’t believe he will change for you. Even if he swears he wants to change because he feels differently since meeting you. THIS IS WHAT HE MOST LIKELY TOLD MANY WOMEN BEFORE YOU. Too many women think that everyone has the ability to change, so why not give him a shot? You are not a human guinea pig for his monogamy experiments. Be friends with him for four months. Just friends. See if he can keep it in his pants, then perhaps give him a shot. But not before he can prove it to you, with more than words, by pursuing you. Being pushy and aggressive to change your mind might be considered a compliment by some, when in reality it is just him trying to get what HE wants. And let’s be real, he is making promises, and promises made by players are easily broken. Think about how many other women heard those same promises.
- If he just got out of a relationship within the last 6 months, don’t feel you have to get into a relationship with him right now or risk losing him to another. The real risk you are facing is being a rebound, and those rarely ever work out.
- If he has broken up with you a zillion times before, stop looking at the risk of never knowing what could have been. He will break up with you a zillion more times and hurt you over and over again. Don’t think you run the risk of never getting closure if you don’t give him another chance. The real way you get closure is by realizing he doesn’t deserve another chance, and you MOVE ON.
- If he has lied a billion times, don’t think he will turn over a new leaf. He is a liar, and you risk being lied to over and over again. Stop lying to yourself by believing you have a shot with him. Tell yourself the truth that you risk being betrayed yet again by a man who lies, and ditch him.
The real risk is not that you will lose a great guy who suddenly will change for you and has learned his lesson. The real risk involved is that you keep giving the wrong guys the chance to hurt you again, or get into relationships that have no real chance of survival.
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