Are you tired of being second choice in your relationship? Do you complain that the man in your life always has so much to do that he has no time for you? Are you upset that everything else seems to be a major priority except spending time with you? Have you discussed it with him and have gotten no where? It is time to do something about it. Women need to stop thinking that TALKING solves things, when 90% of the time if you don’t follow it up with actions, talking solves nothing.
Stop talking already. They aren’t LISTENING. If you don’t care enough to do something about it, they won’t either. If you are tired of being second choice you need to do something about it. Got it? Good.
Let’s say your boyfriend recently signed up for softball on Tuesday and Saturday afternoons, and bowling on Saturday and Thursday nights. You are super pissed off because these activities cut into your time together in a major way. Due to his job, kids, whatever, you barely see him as it is, and now you will see him even less. Sure, start off by TALKING to him about it, but follow it up with your actions. Simply saying to him “Oh great, now we are not going to have time to see each other” isn’t going to cut it.
You normally go with him to the movies or out to dinner on Saturday nights but now you can’t because of his bowling? He can’t go with you, but you can still go. Find a friend, family member, coworker, anyone, just go. Make sure you let him know that you have found someone else to go with. Don’t let him think you are sitting home while he is out and that you are going to let HIS choices affect what YOU do. Let him miss out on doing something fun with you. On Tuesday night and Saturday afternoon when he is at baseball practice GO DO SOMETHING. When he is finished and wants to see you, let him try and find you. Don’t rush home because he is done, try coming home late or canceling out. Don’t let him squeeze you in, learn to say “No, I am busy with my plans, just like you get busy with yours”. If you want him to see the value in your time together, then show his just how valuable your time IS. An overly available women shows him HIS time is valuable, and she shows him her time is not.
Women are so afraid to say no when their boyfriends plans fall through and now he wants to see her. Why? Don’t you see that by making HIM your top priority and revolving your life around him you helped create this situation? Make your time valuable. If you want to do something with your boyfriend and he says he can’t make plans with you because he might have to see his kids don’t WAIT until he finds out, tell him “Never mind, My friend ___ wants to do something, I will go out with them”. Watch the shock on his face!
Now you are showing him HE is not a priority because he hasn’t made YOU one. He wont like it any more than YOU do. When your boyfriend tells you his buddies canceled on him and would you like to do something for heaven’s sake tell him “NO, I already made plans”. Let HIM sit at home with nothing to do wondering if YOU are having a good time like you have done a thousand times. Even if you don’t have plans LIE or make some!!! Don’t EVER cancel your plans because HIS plans were canceled or fell through.
If you want to make yourself a priority to him, you have to make yourself a priority first. Don’t count on him as your only companion. He doesn’t have time to do stuff you enjoy? Do it yourself or with someone ELSE. Don’t rely on him for every social activity or hobby you enjoy. Show him you made yourself a priority and he will too. If he doesn’t, you will be too busy to notice, and wont settle for a man who only has time to squeeze you in when it is convenient for HIM.
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