To Change the Relationship You Have to Change Yourself

How long are you willing to wait for him to change the relationship? How long is long enough? How long are you willing to wait for change?

In a relationship quite often women find themselves waiting in a state of limbo for their relationship to change or for the other person to change their ways. Well how long are you willing to wait? And WHY?

If the person you are with makes you miserable, unhappy, or does not meet your needs, don’t you first have to acknowledge that this person RIGHT NOW is not RIGHT for you? Do you look at them and assess your relationship for what it is, or are you holding on to what you THINK it could be? Or what is was? If you are, then you are not dealing with the reality of your situation, but the fantasy of what it could be if a miracle happens. Is this the kind of relationship you want to have? One where you keep wishing and hoping the dynamics will change one day and it becomes the relationship of your dreams?

change the relationship

To Change the Relationship You Have to Change Yourself

Not everyone is right for us, but why is there such a problem for women acknowledging just that? Not every many you encounter along the way will be Mr. Right, as matter of fact, the greater majority of them will be Mr. Wrong. Right now, this person is not right for you. Should you wait for them to become the right person? Who says they will? If their past behavior (not the first 1-3 months when everyone is on their best behavior) is the same as their present behavior, isn’t it time to accept that this is who they ARE? Feelings are known to “cool” over long periods of time, yet every woman expects her mans feelings to strengthen. That does not always happen, so don’t be shocked if it doesn’t.

Can people change who they ARE? Why should they? Because they love YOU? If they haven’t been willing to change in the past and are resisting change now, should you be optimistic that they will change in the future? What do you think is going to bring about change? Miracle? Epiphany? How many people do YOU know that have changed how they behave in a relationship or their feelings towards their relationship by miracle or epiphany? Have you changed your outlook or attitudes towards a relationship out of the blue?

I don’t know anyone who has, and chances are you don’t either. So why do so many women believe that change can and will occur while we sit idly by and do nothing? Isn’t it time to dispel the myth that one day someone is going to just suddenly decide (without any provocation) to treat us the way we want?

Yes relationships and love are often ruled by emotion, but should logic and common sense go out the window? Shouldn’t we take some logic and our common sense along for the ride?

And why do women often think that if a change will occur, that it will be for the better? Look at any relationship that you have had (or are in) that you wanted to see major changes in. How many of them, without you doing anything, have changed for the better? How many of them have changed for the worse? If you had a disease would you go to the doctor and get treatment or medicine or would you wait for it to get better on it’s own? Sure, if it is the sniffles or something minor, a trip to the doctor may not be necessary but if it is a serious disease it’s it more likely that without any medical intervention, you are more likely to get worse and feel worse than better? Sure there are medical miracles, but they are few and far between.

If your health and your life were at risk, would you roll the dice and hope for a miracle or would you do something about it? Well, this is your life too, and your happiness is at stake, and your life that you are wasting. Are you really willing to hope for a miracle, or is it time to accept REALITY and make some changes for yourself rather than wait for someone else to change FOR you? Women have so much power yet give it away to someone else, and it is time for them to take their power back. Stop living in fantasy-land and dreaming about a future that you are not guaranteed, take 2 two large doses of reality, wash it down with common sense, and relax and you will start feeling healthier in no time.


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Sarah Adelle

Sarah is a Certified Relationship Life Coach and Soulmate ~ Twin Flame expert with 20+ years experience helping clients around the world live the life and have the relationship they desire. Sarah is here to empower you to see the truth in your situation, not enable you to remain in a place that keeps you stuck and unhappy. Sarah will lift you to see the reality of your situation, providing guidance to see you through it. She will also help you get control of your relationship, if it can be saved, so you have can the relationship you have hoped for. Sarah co-hosts two weekly radio shows, primarily geared toward relationship issues, called Empower Enlighten Envision on Weds nights on BlogTalkRadio as well as CBS NewSkyRadio. 


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